just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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