I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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