How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Randomize
