i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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