so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
