Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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