new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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