Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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