Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
