Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
