Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
