I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Damn victory sex feels great
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
