people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize