"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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