a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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