I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
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