All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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