I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
this hospital has no fireball
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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