I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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