It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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