It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
