i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
