your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
