You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
