Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
