haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
