I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
