So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
And then the night went full on bisexual.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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