i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
