Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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