thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
