I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
