I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
