Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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