Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
