I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
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