Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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