so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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