is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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