hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
