She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
