i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Randomize
