try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
