Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
