youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
