she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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