I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
