Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
