READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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