she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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